Election watch: 4 phenomena that magically manifest now we’re in electo-mode

 1. The infamous Innijiet. Things kicked off to a glorious hamallata last Sunday, when what seemed like the entire corps of what would be our trailer trash community showed up with enthusiasm to greet (a highly uncomfortable) PM during his “impromptu” Balzan meeting. Gonzi huwa il-mexxej, Alleljuljah – although the most telling video has mysteriously disappeared from the ‘net, this was the preferred refrain. Classy.

A competition to see who comes up with the best haiku verses. The flags aid concentration.

Not that the PL mobs need worry about being left at the post when it comes to a beautifully vulgar display of rebel-rousing. You can bet your last Mintoff flag  – a vintage item that is likely to get you a killing if you can only prise it away from Ċetta l-Bormliża’s grubby paws – that before long we will have a suitably witty (ahem) comeback from everybody’s favourite Underdogs. If this and this are anything to go by, we can look forward to Labour supporters informing us, in haiku format, why Muscat deserves a vote.

2. The cyber friendship requests.It had already happened with the previous election, when my cyber-world was taken over by requests from, not real people, but political pen-pushers hailing from both camps. The popular terminology to describe them is, I am reliable informed, “elves”.

In cyber world I operate an open-door policy of friendship. The elves are still there in fact and over the past years  their posts have been a continuous source of sardonic sniggers. Yes, such people have their uses and they tend to score pretty high on the entertainment factor. Given the way the wind has been blowing, over the past week this entertainment factor has gone through the roof. Yes, the elves are there to stay so don’t get too excited at seeing all sorts of shades from the political colour spectrum in my virtual life. That’s the fun thing about cyber space,  friendships mean jack.

Needless to say I don’t  operate quite the same open door policy in real life. Just saying.

3. A corollary to the above is the prospective Hons themselves’ sudden rise in popularity.As in, their friends keep organising parties for them. Everytime I see an advert on the lines of Coffee Morning to support So’n’So, organised by Friends of So’n’So I can’t help feeling hard done by. My friends suck bigtime, they never organise these parties for me.

Seriously, though. What is it with these vote-catching coffee mornings? Why in the name of all that’s unholy would anyone want to submit themselves to a morning of cheap coffee, stale pasti, cold pastizzi and the never-ending speeches of some boring candidate or other. Maybe it’s the prospect of singing all those Innijiet, I don’t know.

4. Endless, tedious parliamentary debates on local TV. Only, this time round the pompous officiousness will be generously sugared.  Because for every boring debate we roll our eyes through, we will be rewarded with this sort of thing. And this. Only, this time round it won’t be Franco Debono who takes on the role of star. Cue sighs of relief all around.  Much as the divorce debate was punctuated by the oft-vulgar, always-hilarious wit of the likes of Satiristan (then known as Divorzistan, of course) and eventually Bis-Serjeta. The next election will not be fought on the conventional media through conventional print and TV campaigns. Public opinion will be formed and swayed through platforms like Twitter and Facebook. And watching a stable of candidates (most of whom are hardly spring chickens) trying to cope with these new media without making fools of themselves promises to be hilarous.

All this, of course, provided the upcoming motion of no confidence doesn’t drag endlessly with pointless debates. And provided Franco Debono actually gives a “nay” when the vote is taken (I still have my doubts on this).

You can enjoy more election fun with markbiwwa’s excellent post about why he’s raring for an election here. This blog is also part of the J’Accuse election soapbox, do drop by there.

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Comments

  1. Cheers for the plug and love the post ! I would add another phenomenon now that the PN has a social media strategy – judging by who is running it we can expect some below the belt tactics evolving (devolving) onto the net. The first phase (the plurality of Young Nat Turk Blogs) is already there for all to see…

  2. markbiwwa says:

    Cheers for the mention. I look forward to stepping off my soapbox and launching it straight into the face of the oncoming election bullshit.

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